Memoirs of My Traditional Marriage

We came late. People had waited long and were in a hurry to go.

We got in for the negotiations. I am not used to any of such. So, I was really apprehensive. My parents were too, since they didn't know the traditions of our host. So, when the eldest man of the family began to pour out and count the pear seeds, our unease rose to a max. My mum's face went pale, my dad shrunk, and I could feel my hollow tummy. We waited as he counted. 

It turned out that the pear seeds was a symbol of money. Each pear was a thousand Naira. And since we were not bargaining for a goat, but a woman, we can't haggle money directly. The culture said we had to go back and forth on it three times. So, we did. When it was done, the elder counted __ seeds and another__ seeds. The deal was done. The tradition says pay the first set now and the second set whenever. 

Next, Victor Akpagu whisked me away to get photographed. The next twenty minutes was clinging and snapping with Somto and her girls.We were back to the field to the event. 

I kept typing my memoir as a way to keep occupied amidst the activities - I have little interest in events. I stopped typing only to greet people. I loved my sun-glasses. They made me look mean. 

Somto danced to the different canopies to greet the guests. She was beautiful. They made her sell eggs to the audience. She laughed all through the sales. Then she got my Palm wine, we danced to her dad - his representative (he forgot in his busyness to sit in for the wine pouring) - and knelt down to be blessed. 

I danced all I could. She tried to dance too. We both are not dancers. But we danced. The event quickly wound up because the visitors from long distance were keen to go. The vote of thanks was my three short sentences in Igbo. I said a quick good bye and jumped into the waiting van. 

Church tradition did not permit Somto to go with us.This weekend the traditions will be met. Somto will go home with me. The deed would have been done. 

Take this as a soft reminder of my wedding event this weekend, Saturday 11 September. 

Chinedu, Enugu, September 4.