Eze's Musing

We came late. People had waited long and were in a hurry to go. We got in for the negotiations. I am not used to any of such. So, I was really apprehensive. My parents were too, since they didn't know the traditions of our host. So, when the eldest man of the family began to pour out and count the pear seeds, our unease rose to a max. My mum's face went pale, my dad shrunk, and I could feel my hollow tummy. We waited as he counted.  It turned out that the pear seeds was a symbol of money. Each pear was a thousand Naira. And since we were not bargaining for a goat, but a woman, we can't haggle money directly. The culture said we had to go back and forth on it three times. So, we did. When it was done, the elder counted __ seeds and another__ seeds. The deal was done. The tradition says pay the first set now and the second set whenever.  Next, Victor Akpagu whisked me away to get photographed. The next twenty minutes was clinging and snapping with Somto and her girls.We we

In it all, there is this part of us that just wants to sit and observe it all: no speeches, no interests to protect, and no end to meet. Just a proper analysis of all things and wonder at the whys and the bases. That part of me makes a debut quite often. I find that I mostly want to observe, to experiment - to do things just to observe the outcomes. Go to places, hang out with people, try out an idea, do a project, and the list goes on and on. There is this urge to experience, reflect on the experience, and then recount them in speech and writing. And I wish that could be the default mode of life - no real consequences, just an unending sequence of trying, reflecting, and recounting. But life is not just a series of harmless events and choices. There are roads we take and never return; actions come with serious reactions. And even more saddening is societal cum moral expectations. We find that we can't just be passive and objective when some matters are discussed; certain social gr

I was born and raised in a lower-class family. Or if you will bother with more accuracy, top lower-class, for even among the low, some are lower. Dad did his best to give my siblings and me a fine education. So, since my school days, I have mingled with children from higher social standing. Today, I have become in the eyes of society a middle-income man due to where I work. I do not see myself as a middle-income man, because my network is still rooted in the lower rungs, and I am still within their everyday demands. How do I live a mid-income life amidst the poverty of my network? My inner life is a constant tussle between the realities of the lower class and the expectations of the middle class. So, spending is a headache - every dime spent has to be justified, and every need must be questioned for legitimacy. Every buy is considered in the light of how many families it could feed. It is a constant barrage of what the alternative uses are. Needs are real, expectations are real too, an

I am a Christian, I was born into Christianity. Over the years, I have walked my own spiritual journey in the overall framework of Christianity. So, some micro beliefs that once mattered no longer do. Some, practices are now clearly seen as simple traditions that have nothing to do with right standing with God.   Years of both religious, philosophical, and historical study also lend a particular color to my view of what matters most in the Christian religion. Since I have been an individual who is keen about my internal belief system matching my external actions, it has been a hard battle with living true to the  requirements of the established church - my mind keeps sorting which is essential and which is simply an addendum. Organized Christianity has a strong pull, you can't dissent easily. Plus the sentiments are deeply rooted such that they block off even obvious points from the Holy book. Dissent is negated no matter how Bible-based it is. The norm just have to be maintained,

I remember a story I was told when I was a child. How the Spider got his distinct thorax-abdomen constriction. The spider, it was told had agreed with different people to be in their event (or was it to help them on the farm?). The activities for the different groups fell into the same day and time. So, when it was time they all came to take the spider along. A heated argument arose, each claiming that they informed him first, and so had the right to take him along; and their engagements were all very important. Nobody wanted to listen to anybody, so they each tied a rope on Mr. Spider's waist in an attempt to drag him off from the others. The four parties ended up pulling at four different directions. The result is what we see today. Today, I will call myself that spider. Not that I have agreed to attend a function, but that I have achieved a duality (if not quadruplicity) in my religious and social interactions that has now presented a difficulty in planning my special event. No

Image by autumnsgoddess0 from Pixabay A girl tripped me and I fell in love. Marriage is on my mind. Don't tell me you saw it coming. Just-us'21 is happening in September, the culmination of our love story into permanence. I met Somto in teens church 11 years ago - we both were teenagers serving on the teens executive team. I caught a fancy for her, a fancy that has lasted till today. By a series of events attributable to Providence, we are both here and eager to say I do. I captured a few of my love story in - Flux , Passions Due Time , and A Rare Fusion . Take this as an unofficial invitation to Just-us 21' and an official request for support. Although, I fell in love, now I have to plan into Marriage. Be my help in this most exciting time. Feel free to reach me for more details. My best regards. Chinedu

Photos by qimono at pixabay I am getting married!!! Yes, I am. Many people talk about their vision of how they would feel when they are about getting married, but I didn't have any. So, here am I about to get married, but I feel very regular, of course, except for having to spend more  So, who are my marrying? My teenage-time crush!  An all time prayer point!! Some how Providence kept Somto single till I was ready. Come September 11, God willing, I will be married to Somto. I send this as an informal notification and a formal request for support - good will and monetary - mostly monetary really. '"One person does not cook for the community", the Igbos say; signifying that when it comes to catering for a community project, an individual can only do so well, when that same community helps. In these few weeks, I have understood this more as needs and requirements mount. I will be pleased to get support from you as I anticipate September 11, the day Chinedu says 'I do